Wednesday, November 26, 2008

WOW!!! Amazing. Just when I needed it

Any of you who know me know my love for music and lyrics. Just as I was feeling weak and broken again I heard this song. I have copied the lyrics for you to share with me. I am amazed everyday with music.

Sara Bareilles Gravity lyrics

Something always brings me back to you. It never takes too long. No matter what I say or do, I still feel you here 'till the moment I'm gone. You hold me without touch. You keep me without chains. I never wanted anything so much than to drown in your love and not feel your rain.

CHORUS Set me free, leave me be. I don't want to fall another moment into your gravity. Here I am and I stand so tall, just the way I'm supposed to be. But you're on to me and all over me. You loved me 'cause I'm fragile. When I thought that I was strong. But you touch me for a little while and all my fragile strength is gone.

CHORUS Set me free, leave me be. I don't want to fall another moment into your gravity. Here I am and I stand so tall, just the way I'm supposed to be. But you're on to me and all over me. I live here on my knees as

I Try to make you see that you're Everything I think I need here on the ground. But you're neither friend nor foe though I Can't seem to let you go. The one thing that I still know is that you're keeping me downYou're keeping me down, yeah, yeah, yeahYou're onto me, onto me and all overSomething always brings me back to youIt never takes too long

Whatever Wednesday

Well here I am again. Sorry about the burp there I was having a mini meltdown and needed a moment to pull it back together.

The weekend in Watertown was a blast to say the least. However my son got into the camera and deleted the pictures again. The things he does amaze me always. But anyway we went to Buff's Pub in Newton on Friday and had drinks with Danielle's client Sarah. She was unexpected but fun to be around. It is always interesting to meet new people and hear their stories. Annie the waitress is always pleasant and finds a way to get me some tequila. Love that girl Annie. LOL
Saturday Danielle and I drove down to Tabor Academy in Marion, Ma. to watch my niece scrimmage agains the Navy Prep. It was great to finally see her throwing the ball. It has been a while since I have been able to watch her play the game she loves so much. Tabor was so beautiful. It is Cape style buildings on the water and boasts of all the amenities a teen cool ask for. Shanise always been Shanise informs me that there are pot smoking whores there. LMFAO. She is funny I tell ya. Then at night we all sat around and had some buffalo dip and watch Forgetting Sarah Marshall. It was a quiet night but still fun. Sunday Shanise and I drove into Cambridge and did some grocery shopping. I made them all some spaghetti and meatballs for dinner. When Danielle came upstairs from the gym she was savoring the smell since that is not a normal thing around there. Baked Chicken yes, Pasta no. Pasta Bad. LOL We all loved it and sat around and watch the Patriots blow away the Dolphins and then we watched the AMA's. I am sure I missed some excitement along the way but it was fun and I extended my vacation an extra day and came home Monday morning.

Work sucks right now. There are people there that can't mind their own business and do their jobs so the rest of us now have to suffer. It is like being in grade school and I am so done with that. I want to scream at the top of my lungs and just say "shut the fuck up and cut some fucking vegetables you methodone using BITCH". Ooops see I had to type it since I can't just go around screaming that in work. But really for 20 yrs I have worked there and it has never been so tense. People are starting to melt down and I will soon be forced back into a cubicle world to avoid it.

The ex texted me on Sunday and then called only to say he HONESTLY missed me. Honesty is a word that is completely foreign to him so I don't even know who taught him that so that he could use it. We had this BULLSHIT conversation about he was sorry and he had untied issues and they were resolved now. Well needless to say he hasn't texted or called again. I was in a Dither as I like to call it. I was back in bed feeling like I was suffocating and all that other shit that comes along w/ being involved with him. I was questioning God on why he would keep bringing him back into my life and testing me. I don't want to be tested. He is my weakness. He is my temptation. But above all he is my ILLNESS. He is the disease that I fight so hard to find a cure for. And everytime I am feeling better and moving on he appears. WHY?

Well I am off to work for the WHOLE day. This will not be fun but I have to do it so I can buy some presents and pretend that Santa is real and all that fun shit. Talk to you soon

Tuesday, November 25, 2008

Back to reality Tuesday

Hello all, I am back to reality here in Sturbridge. I had a blast this weekend but it tired me out so I had to rest yesterday. I am off to work and will repost when I get home. Hope everyone enjoyed their weekend as well

Thursday, November 20, 2008

OMG Thank the Heavens the weekend is almost here

AAArrrghh!!! I have had a hell of a week over here. They fired one person I have worked with for 20 yrs for pushing my friend at work. Then my other friend Mike decided to have a fucking melt down at work and walk out. WTF??? There must be too much oil in the air at work clogging more than arteries. Brains are being fried like eggs in that place.

This family of mine is driving me over the edge. DEMANDING I tell ya. They are like breast feeding triplets. They all need something at all times. Not a one of them is able to pick up a sock let alone anything else. I am putting the pedal to the metal tomorrow and heading to Watertown to spend the weekend w/ my sister Danielle and her husband Jim. They better have some beers chilling when I get there. I need them.

My teeth are clenched and my heart is racing. I need to sit and relax. HELP.... LOL

Tuesday, November 18, 2008

Wow how time flies even when your not having all that much fun

I can't believe it has almost been 10 days since I last updated my blog. The days have just seem to run on and on and on. Lots of work with minimal play. Which is so not my way of living. I guess every once in a while I have to be the grown up and work. Its just working 50 hours a week might just be too much for a fun loving girl such as myself. LOL

It is with great joy and amazement that I write that my son's first quarter report card came home with all B's and awesome comments. They acknowledge the great improvements he has made academically in the last few months. It is a complete turn around from last year when he refused to even open a book and attempt to appear interested. I am proud of him and am happy he is making strides towards doing better. He even applied for his first job yesterday. Hopefully he gets it as it will keep him busy and off the streets. Cross your fingers.

LOVE LIFE: Blah Blah Blah. It is on these cold lonely nights that I miss the ex. The one who hurt me twice. He wasn't good for much as I have come to find out but he was good in the sense of snuggling up with him and talking. Even if it was all BULLSHIT. At least he was a body but I am not saying I want him back. I just want that feeling of having someone there for me. But the next time the time and words we share will have actual meaning. I have to at least hope for that. I am not really out there looking I guess so I don't know what I can expect. I guess I would like that fairy tale lover to appear. The one on the white horse who will wash away all the bad memories from the past. The man who you dream about as a little girl. Oh man, it sucks when you grow up and all the smokey dreams are battered away by BAD BAD men. LMFAO Until then I will do what I do and wait. All good things come to those who wait right?

I had a really fun weekend this past weekend considering it was nothing that was planned. I slept at my cousin Jesse and his new wife Tennaile's house. They are always a blast and worth the drive over. We just laughed all night and then again in the morning. I decided at the last minute to sleep over Kristen and Jay's on Saturday night and it proved to be worth it. Kris and I hooked up with Cindy Lou and just sat around her apartment having beers, sharing stories, dancing and practicing some old cheerleader moves. Needless to say the belly hurt from laughing and the knee hurt from the attempt at doing the splits but it was so fun. Those are some of the best nights of my life. Unscripted and unplanned. Just flying freely and enjoying my life.

Sunday, November 9, 2008

Just another day

Today is just another day of days that seem to just run into each other without much happening in between. I have to work 10 days straight and over 100 hrs before I can get a day off. And I am looking forward to it since I get next weekend off.

I had been talking to this guy friend of mine for awhile online and I thought the conversations were going well and that we had a lot to talk about. Then BAM it stopped. I was a little confused about the whole thing but I don't have the energy to over think it and pursue it any further. Just really confused by men yet again. Why ruin a good thing? It was just simple conversation. Did he get scared as if I wanted a wedding ring after two weeks of typing? Come on I am not even the type. Whatever men are just too much sometimes.

My knee is finally getting to the stage of walking without limping and pain. I am going to try to start walking again if only a few miles a day and try to work back up to 5. I need to get myself back on track over here.

The kid is good, home is good and the friends are good. How much more can a girl ask for. One day at a time right?

Wednesday, November 5, 2008

Start to a great day

I stayed up way past my bedtime last night to watch history in the making. I stayed up till a whopping 10 p.m. Go me !! It was so worth it. It is amazing the number of people who voted and also the number of people who made the right decision. Go AMERICA... LOL This is the start of a bright future.

And I am also thrilled because my sister was OBSESSED and was running around in a Barack shirt for days. Not sleeping and was glued to the tv and internet. This would have been a devestating upset to the poor girl. LOL And she had me going too.

Well, I am off to work for a nice 11 hr day. Talk to you all soon.

Share your thoughts on this election if you will

Tuesday, November 4, 2008

Make your opinion count even if it's not the same as mine !!!

Today is the big day. Voting Day !!! Get out there and make a difference. Make your voice and opinion count. If you don't vote you can't complain. And I love to complain so I will be out there trying to make a difference. We don't all have to share the same opinions and beliefs. We just have to believe in the ones we have. Things will not change and shall forever be the same if we don't get out there and do what we have the right to do. VOTE !!!
Go online and find a voting location in your area and just do it:
If you haven't had the time to read and follow either of the candidates here are some quick notes to keep in mind. Don't forget you have all day to vote so read up and get out there.

Obama's Stance on the Economy
Barack Obama has offered a detailed plan to get America’s economy back on track, by creating new jobs and easing the burden on hardworking Americans by offering middle-class tax cuts three times the size of McCain’s.

McCain's Stance on the Economy
John McCain’s economic policy is the same as George Bush’s. It ignores middle class Americans, giving $200 billion in tax cuts to corporations, including $4 billion in tax breaks to Big Oil, while leaving over 100 million middle-class Americans with no relief. Economists say McCain’s plan will add $3.4 trillion to the national debt.

Obama's Stance on Education
Barack Obama puts children first by investing in early childhood education, making sure our schools are adequately funded and led by high-quality teachers, and reforming No Child Left Behind.

McCain's Stance on Education
John McCain supported George Bush’s tax cuts for the wealthiest Americans instead of much-needed funding for our students, teachers, and failing local classrooms.

Obama's Stance on Energy
Barack Obama will invest in alternative fuels and renewable energy, including a plan to increase America’s energy efficiency and create 5 million new “green” jobs.

McCain's Stance on Energy
John McCain has repeatedly opposed renewable and alternative energy proposals, has promised oil companies a new $4 billion tax break and hired a number of powerful oil lobbyists to run his campaign.

Obama's Stance on Ethics
Barack Obama has been a leader on government transparency – refusing to take donations from lobbyists or PACs, improving disclosure and creating a database where the public can track federal contracts and earmarks.

McCain's Stance on Ethics
John McCain has no less than 177 lobbyists working on his campaign, including many of his top advisors. McCain’s own campaign manager continued to receive money from Freddie Mac until August 2008.

Obama's Stance on Foreign Policy
Barack Obama will continue the long American tradition of smart diplomacy to keep the country safe while improving America’s standing in the world.

McCain's Stance on Foreign Policy
John McCain will carry on George Bush’s policy of unilateral action that puts American troops in harm’s way without exhausting diplomatic options.

Obama's Stance on Health Care
Barack Obama’s health care plan will provide accessible, affordable coverage for all, and it will reduce health care costs for families.
McCain's Stance on Health Care
John McCain’s health plan would tax health benefits for the first time ever — imposing a trillion tax increase on working families and leaving millions without heath care.

Obama's Stance on Homeland Security
Barack Obama supports increased security measures for our airports, ports, and land borders, part of a national plan to protect American’s infrastructure and keep our communities safe.

McCain's Stance on Homeland Security
John McCain opposed increased screening of cargo entering the United States and opposed increased security for airport, port and boarder security.

Obama's Stance on Iraq
Barack Obama will work with his military commanders to responsibly end the war in Iraq. Obama will refocus our resources on al Qaeda in Afghanistan and finish the fight with the terrorists who attacked us on 9/11.

McCain's Stance on Iraq
John McCain has no plan to end the war in Iraq, and would keep spending $10 billion a month in Iraq while the Iraqi government sits on a huge surplus. McCain calls Iraq "the central front of the war on terror" even though Osama bin Laden and the al Qaeda terrorists who attacked us are getting stronger in Afghanistan and Pakistan.

Monday, November 3, 2008

It is what it is right?

Today I am in a mood. Not a good mood but not a bad mood. Simply a mood. Most women would understand that mood I think. Its simply one of those moods where your mind is overwhelmed with thoughts but you really are too tired to even attempt to process them all. A BLAH kind of mood really, kinda , sorta.................

I never really thought I hated the winters here in New England but I find myself getting more miserable with each passing COLD ASS day. I just don't think I was ready for this weather. I am not ready to run outside at 5:30 in the morning to start my car and then run back into the house to remove the icicles from my freshly washed locks of wild curls. Where did the sun go? What do I have to do to get back to Cancun where the weather was hold and the beers were cold? I just don't think I am ready for this. Are you?

LOVE LIFE: I have this aching feeling that I am in need of a relationship. I am feeling like it is time for that type of relationship where I am spending my free time with someone who is worthy of my laughter, personality and all that I have to offer. But am I willing to settle? NO, I am not. I have done it in the past and would rather walk the road alone then be with someone who doesn't want to put in the effort that it takes to have a meaningful relationship. Sex is great but don't we really want more out of it? I know I do. Only time can tell though. Pickings are slim around these parts.

DIET: Argghh!!!! It is so hard to lose weight when you are partially disabled. I can't walk so that pretty much cuts out excersize that burns the calories that I need to lose weight. I am still cutting down on my intake but NOTHING is happening. BULLSHIT I tell ya. LOL

Halloween was a lot of fun. I actually gave out candy this year which is something I never am home to do. I got out of work early grabbed some candy and waited for the kids to arrive. Our driveway is kind of long for the little guys so there weren't too many trick or treaters. The ones that came were cute and reminded me of what fun it was to dress up and join in when I was little. Then I got dressed up as a PINK LADY from Grease as I was too cheap to go buy a costume and had this one on hand. I went to Barb and Chrissy's and joined in on some adult fun. A few of the neighbors came and then some of their friends. It was more of a get together than a party but to me it was just right. The right crowd , the right music, the right drinks and the right fire. What more could a girl ask for then a fun night with friends? Ok, maybe I could think of a couple of things.