Thursday, December 18, 2008

Ok, I am about to surrender. HELP

Ok I am sitting here fighting the urge to surrender to the holiday pressure. I try to keep in the back of my mind that I am not alone but it just isn't making it any better.

There is a week till Christmas and all the pretending I have done to get in the spirit just isn't cutting it. I am broke. I am tired. I am stressed.

I read an article in my local newspaper where a man drove to a grocery store parking lot and took a gun and ended his life. They say he was recently unemployed and had a breakup. They also said that the influx of suicide attempt calls has greatly increased. This is sad I tell ya. But believe me I am far from even the thought of attempting suicide. I just think it is so sad that people are that stressed out. People struggling and giving up. I understand their stress and feel bad for their families. Times are tough. But I have to believe they will get better.

I try everyday when I get up to think of positive things and happy thoughts. Think of things that bring a smile to my face. But some mornings it just isn't that easy. But if you do look around, listen to other peoples stories and read the news you will see people have it much worse. I will keep pushing my thought process through the negative moments. I have to. I will get through this.

On a more positive note, I traveled to Connecticut with my sister yesterday to watch my neice play in a basketball tournament at Loomis Chaffee. They lost but it was still exciting to watch her play the game she loves so much. That brings a smile to my face :)

I received a nice positive email last night from my sons school saying how well he is doing and how impressed they are. I am always happy when I open an email from them and it is filled with positive words and not those oh so negative words that I am used to. That is looking up. He may finally be getting it together.

Well I am off to work. I have one other post that I will be posting but want it to be seperate. If anyone has something to share let me know.

I hope everyone else is doing ok and getting through the tough times.

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